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- June 25, 2008
Older Woman–Younger Man
They call them Cougars. They’re described as successful, self-confident baby boomer women who prefer the company of a younger man. This attitude has always been prevalent in Hollywood. Remember the 70s romance between Dinah Shore and Burt Reynolds, who was more than 20 years younger? Or what about the relationship between John Travolta, when he was 22 and actress Diana Hyland who was 40 at the time?
Have you ever dated a younger man? While some may say there’s a lot of excitement in an older woman/younger man relationship, I believe it can also be a challenging one. It’s possible to remain a strong couple, but others disintegrate. Here are a few reasons the younger man/older woman relationship falls apart:
* A different vision for their lives.
At midlife and beyond, many women have carved out a vision for their lives that has created a certain level of success. Meanwhile, many twenty and thirty-something men are still living life in the fast lane and on a womanizing conquest. You, as the older women, may be able to tolerate his “wild side” but how much womanizing would you be willing to put up with while he’s still trying to find himself?
* Different values
How he was raised and his life experiences will certainly have an impact on your relationship. Just the fact that you come from a different generation presents challenges. By nature, many older women say they value family relationships, so what happens when you meet a young man who has no idea what it means to have family values? How will this difference play out for you over time?
* Communication.
This one seems obvious, but it isn’t. The strength of any relationship lies in communication. And that means learning to communicate effectively beyond the bedroom! If there is strong chemistry, values, shared dreams, and interests, communication makes those qualities stronger.
There is one consolation with the older woman/younger man relationship, according to Andy Rooney:
“Older women are forthright and honest. They’ll tell you right off you are a jerk if you
are acting like one.”
6 Responses to “Older Woman–Younger Man”
I did a couple of times when I was about 35. It was lots of fun.
By Nessa on Jun 25, 2008
When I was young, all my boyfriends were 5 to 14 years older than me. From my 30′s on, they have all been 2 to 12 years younger.
That’s because I was mature for my age as a kid, and immature for my age as an adult! :-) It’s still hard for me to believe I’m 52 years old.
By Wendy on Jun 27, 2008
The only younger man I ever dated was when I was in high school. He was two years younger. My first husband was ten years OLDER. Which is better? Well, in my case NEITHER :)
By Beverly Mahone on Jun 27, 2008
I have never considered it. I have always preferred older men. Perhaps because men mature emotionally much slower than women?
By Melodieann Whiteley on Jun 27, 2008
I have been married to a man 12 years older, and one my same age. I always dated younger in high school.
As an older, more mature woman, I have no interest in men my own age or older. If I ever find myself widowed, I won’t be getting married again, but bring on the youth! Someone with energy and a lust for life, and one that can dance!
By Pam Archer on Jun 29, 2008
Hey!, give the ladies whatever they like, there are pro’s and con’s to either situations. I guess it all comes down to what one actually wants from the relationship and being honest enough to make that extremely clear from the outset, therfore leaving no real room for dissapointment, though always leaving plenty of room for re-evaluation.
If your happy, then why not, but if you are not, then STOP.
By Mr P Lewis on Mar 24, 2009